PROTECT YOUR CHILD

I was not born with a silver spoon or with a gold spoon. My parents were not rich before I came into this world even after my existence but we didn’t beg for food to eat. Though we were not rich, my parent made sure they gave us (their children) that best care in their capacity equivalent to that given to the rich (children) out there. My father and mother never made us do things that deprived us of education or jeopardize our safety. I never hawked anything on the street. I am not saying these things because I am full of myself nor to criticize anyone but to give my opinion on this menace of child hawking.

There is this pain I feel in my heart when I see a child (minor) hawking, especially when he or she should be in school studying. The problem isn’t hawking but why should a little child be hawking when others are studying? I understand that Nigeria has given most homes, situations that they didn’t bargain for, but I think a parent should safeguard his or her child or children from danger. The dangers that come with child hawking is a whole lot to think about.

First, 90% of children that hawk lacks proper formal intelligence because they have limited time to study (that’s if they attend schools). Second, a child that hawks could be easily kidnapped, raped, killed or even joined a bad gang because he or she will go to places even worse places to make sure his or her market is been sold. So tell me what kind of future awaits such a child. Prostitution, addiction, stealing, lying and so on are probably the answers.

 Children are gifts given to families from God. If your friend gives you a gift on your birthday, I’m sure you will cherish and protect that gift with your strength. So, why can’t you protect that gift (children) given to you by God with your strength?

I am very aware of the fact that times are hard. Will that the little money your child brings from hawking enough to make those times easy? My dear, I think it will make things worse because it will change the beautiful future of your child. Your child could be raped or killed or kidnapped. You child might join bad gang bringing ridicule, disgrace or disappointment to you and your family, which will be blamed on you if such happens. If you really need that money from hawking, please do the hawking yourself. At least you are old enough to know danger when you see one but a child might not. Please don’t only care for your child but protect him.

A CHALLENGE TO A CHILD’S DIGNITY

I was not born with a silver spoon or with a gold spoon. My parents were not rich before I came into this world and even after my existence, but we didn’t beg for food to eat. Despite the fact that we were not rich, my parent made sure they gave us (their children) the best care in their capacity equivalent to that given to the rich (children) out there. My father and mother never made us do things that deprived us of education or jeopardize our safety. I never hawked anything on the street. I am not saying these things because I am full of myself nor to criticize anyone but to give my opinion on this menace of child hawking.

There is this pain I feel in my heart when I see a child (minor) hawking, especially when he or she should be in school studying. The problem isn’t hawking, rather why should a little child be hawking when others are studying? I understand that Nigeria has given most homes, situations that they didn’t bargain for, but I think a parent should safeguard his or her child or children from danger. The dangers that come with child hawking is much and can have far-reaching effects on the child as an adult.

First, 90% of children that hawk lacks proper formal intelligence because they have limited time to study (that is if they attend school). Second, a child that hawks could be easily kidnapped, raped, killed or can join a bad gang because he or she will go to places even worse places to make sure he or she sells well. So, image what kind of future awaits such a child. Prostitution, addiction, stealing, lying and so on are probably the answers.

Children are gifts given to families from God. If your friend gives you a gift on your birthday, I’m sure you will cherish and protect that gift with your strength. So, why can’t you protect that gift (child) given to you by God with your strength?

I am aware of the fact that times are hard. However, is the little money your child brings from hawking enough to make times easy? My dear, I think it will make things worse because it could change the beautiful future of your child. You child might join a bad gang, bringing ridicule, disgrace or disappointment to you and your family. If you really need that money from hawking, please do the hawking yourself. At least you are old enough to know danger when you see one, but a child might not. Please do not only care for your child, but also protect him or her.

SEXUAL ABUSE IN MINORS

            Child sexual abuse is a result of abusive behavior that takes advantage of a child’s vulnerability and is in no way related to the sexual orientation of the abusive person.  Child sexual abuse is a form of abuse that includes sexual activity with a minor, when a perpetrator intentionally harms a minor physically, psychologically, sexually or by acts of neglect.

            It does not necessarily mean that it has to be physical contact between a perpetrator and a child.  It could be touching or non-touching activity.  Examples of touching activities include:

Ø  Intercourse

Ø  Fondling

Ø  Sex of any kind with a minor

Ø  Making a minor or a child touch someone else’s genitals, play sexual games or have sex putting objects or body parts (like fingers, tongue or penis) inside the vagina, in the mouth or in the anus of a child for sexual pleasure.

Some examples of non-touching activities include:

Ø  Exhibitionism or exposing oneself to a minor.

Ø  Masturbation in the presence of a minor

Ø  Obscure phone calls, text messages, or digital interaction in the presence of a minor

Ø  Producing, owning or sharing pornographic images or movies of children.

Ø  Sex trafficking.

Ø  Inappropriately watching, a child undresses or uses the bathroom.

The perpetrator of child abuse could be a family member or someone the child or the family knows.  The perpetrator doesn’t have to be an adult to harm a child.  He could be a relation, older sibling or playmate, a coach, or an instructor, a caretaker or parent of another child.

Ø  The perpetrators have tactics which they use to cover their misdeeds.  They could manipulate victims to stay quiet about the sexual abuse using a number of different tactics like manipulation, power of intimidation or convincing the child that it is normal.

As soon as a child is being abused, there are visible signs that show the change in the child.  Children often show, rather than tell that something is upsetting them.  There may be many reasons for changes in their behavior or physically.

Physical signs:

Ø  Bleeding, bruises, swelling of the genital area

Ø  Difficulty in walking or sitting

Ø  Blood, torn, or stained underclothes

Ø  Frequent urinary or yeast infections

Ø  Pain, itching, or burning in the genital area

Behavioral signs:

Ø  Sleeping problems, nightmares

Ø  Becoming unusually secretive

Ø  Outburst of anger

Ø  Acting out in an inappropriate sexual way with toys or objects.

Ø  Sudden unexplained personality changes, mood swings and seeming insecure

Ø  Becoming withdrawn or very clingy

Ø  Regressing to younger behaviors e.g. bedwetting

Ø  Unaccountable fear to particular places or people

Ø  Changes in eating habits.

Ø  Running away from home or school.

Ø  Talk to a new, older friend and unexplained money or gifts.

Ø  New adult words for body parts and no obvious source.

Ø  Self-harm (cutting, burning or other harmful activities).

Ø  Not wanting to be alone with a particular child or young person.

Any one sign doesn’t mean that a child is being abused, but the presence of several suggests that one should begin to ask questions and consider seeking help.  Most of these signs can emerge at other times of stress such as, during divorces; the death of a family member or pet; problems at school or with friends; and other anxiety-inducing or traumatic events.

It is no longer news that, children pass through different stages of development as they grow, and that their awareness and curiosity about sexual matters change as they pass from infancy into childhood and then through puberty to adolescence.  Each child is an individual and will develop in his or her own way.  However, there is a generally accepted range of behaviors linked to a child’s age and developmental stage.  Sometimes these will involve some exploration with other children of a similar age.  It can be difficult to tell the difference between age-appropriate sexual exploration and warning signs of harmful behavior.  Occasionally, we need to explain to children why we would prefer them not to continue with a particular behavior.

This is a chance to talk with them about keeping themselves and others safe and to let them know that they will have listening ears when they need to talk.  Disabled children may develop at different rates, depending on the nature of their disability, and they can be more vulnerable to abuse.  Children with learning disabilities, for example, may behave sexually in ways that are out of step with their age.  Particular care may be needed in educating such children to understand their sexual development and to ensure that they can communicate effectively about any worries they have.